Wow. The sight of the "blogger" block is...intimidating. You know the one I mean. The one where you click on "new post" and BAM there's the big. blank. block. It's a canvas every blogger uses to paint their piece of beauty into the world. Well... I can't promise anything beautiful. Everything in me that has a glimpse of beauty comes from an echo of the God that says I'm Beautiful. It comes from the longing for something beyond myself and the world as I know it. I've glimpsed beauty, the heart of Love, and it's my goal to pursue it.
What's your heart's goal?

Blessings,
Forever Alive

Solider of Light

And the hauntingness of it all...
To behold a light that leaves you grasping
For something beyond yourself,
Is the realization of
something never fulfilled
by human error.
For if to love is gain,
Then to die is to
Commit to a
World fallen.
What will possibly complete the void?
Use the light, dear
Solider!
And be a martyr for thy cause...
Of Masters Love,
Undoubting love,
Of purist Light.
Giving glimpse into
The haunting reality
Of it all...
For a world desperate for
A Solider of Light.

Loving God is to gain, dying spiritually is to commit your heart to this dying world. This poem is about dying for Love, God's Love, which is the purist light for our naturally dark hearts. To die to oneself, in His name is the ultimate gain. When we experience God, it makes us realize how empty we really are without Him. Others need to see this light of Love. Be His Solider, and show others Him!

How We can Know God

How we can know God

Wow tonight's axis youth group was sooo epic! My youth pastor, Dan, first started out with helping us see the point that "Religion is always man's response to the God he thinks he knows". Whatever our posture is in prayer, worship, paradigms, the way we respond to Him, etc, is our response to God in the way we think we know. But we are called to a solid relationship with Him, to be sold out with no middle ground of gray. To be in a relationship we have got to love, of course! And you can't really love someone you don't know, otherwise you are loving someone who isn't there, which isn't loving them at al!. To know God, we have to have the connector of our intimacy with God, the Holy Spirit. The Spirit inside us is the one who gives Christians the passion that calls to God crying "Abba Father!!". Then we can have a relationship with Him, because the Holy Spirit bring to "inlifeinment" the facts of "enlightenment" the church gives us. The Spirit then fully teaches us Who the really One True God is. Then we went over the "Three 33mm ways to know God (points made from Jer. 29:11-13, isaiah 66:22, and Ps. 27:8).

I'm very excited. I learned a lot I already knew in a deeper way tonight!

" I want to know You.
Let Your Spirit overwhelm me.
Let Your presence overtake my
Heart." <3

Edited Me*

Vulnerability

Isn't what it used to be

A time to grow up

A time for change.

Because being just me

Can bring on pain.

Which do you want,

'Mam

The edited or me?

The latter will cost you,

But the first one is free.

Free of the "awkwardness" you would feel

From listening to my thoughts,

Or from feeling that I may effect the "coolness" you've caught.

Because if you spent time with the me

I'd be the one

That you'd call the freak.

"Impaired from portraying the

Superciliousness you seek."

So what do I do?

Just throw me away?

And hope that a "normal" me

Comes up someday?

But wait-

To please you,

To be someone you'd love

I'd have to have nostrils

Catching rain from above.

Yes you see me as a misfit.

But there are others like me.

Others who are wild, creative, original and free.

Free of your sham glam

Free of your prim.

And if you ask me,

I'll be one of them.

So NO you can't have the

Edited me.

Because I'm made better than that,

No one gets me free!

*This is something I wrote a little while back. Looking back on what I wrote, I know that this could come off as if spoken in a frustrated tone. Well, really, it was sad, but anger is best expressed on paper, eh?

You're Here With Me

"I guess it's safe to say
You're never coming back.
And I understand
why you wouldn't want to.
I guess it's up to me
To find a way
To get to you."

These words are the echo of a haunting heart's cry portrayed in "The Thief". These are the first words I heard of this song, and I have to say, it really struck a chord in me. What if these words were my heart's cry to my Savior? And also, is this somewhat similar to the thoughts of the 11 disciples as they watched the empty sky that Jesus had just ascended into?

Acts 1:9-11 says
"These were his last words. As they watched, he was taken up and disappeared in a cloud. They stood there, staring into the empty sky. Suddenly two men appeared—in white robes! They said, “You Galileans!—why do you just stand here looking up at an empty sky? This very Jesus who was taken up from among you to heaven will come as certainly—and mysteriously—as he left.” (MSG)

Although Jesus, in earlier messages, had told the disciples that He was coming back, as humans we always try to doubt. It seems to me that we always try to doubt the very ones we should be trusting, while we get duped by the easiest tricksters! We can certainly see this in the lives of the disciples when it comes to trusting Jesus. So, I don't think it's unreasonable to suspect that they may have been doubting His promises of returning as they watched Him ascend. I know I probably would've at the time. I mean, why would He want to come back? And the forever mind boggling question, why does He love us so? But thankfully, because His love and grace eclipses our sinfulness, He promised to never leave us. So He came back to us in another form- the Holy Spirit. This blows my mind. He could have left us with Scripture, the memories of His ministry, and the gift of Salvation. But because He is gracious, He promised to never leave us. I've come to realize in a new way that the Gift of The Holy Spirit is truly just that- a gift. An incomprehensible expression of Love from above.

To Have More of Him

Jesus said in John 14:6, "I Am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

He also said in John 10:10, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantely"

I've been thinking about the fact that there May be a connection between these verses. Since Jesus is The Life, and He came to give us life in full, then could it be that He's also saying that He came so that we can have Him more abundantely? Think about it... in Bible days, the people's only connection to God was through animal sacrifices. Jesus came to show God. To give us full acces to the Father. So, I think it makes since to say that He came so that we can have Him more abundantely.

To Forget Me Not...

We all forget things. Registration dates, chores, and people's names are just a few of the things I've forgotten lately. But something I've had a hard time recalling lately is the past. What I did two days ago to some of the biggest miracles that happened at youth camp last year to most of my childhood is sometimes a fog. This scares me a little. Scratch that. It scares me AloT. To forget your past is to forget yourself; who you are. This can come in handy in situations. For instince, it helps to able to put anger out of mind, while still having a feeling of cautiousness. Ok, it Is kind of hard to explain. But don't worry. I dont have a memory problem. It's just that I live so much in the moment that other things fade in comparison. Call it extreme focusing.

Someone I sometimes (shamefully) forget is God! He's been with me through it all, blessed me so much and is even died for me, and I have the impertinence to take for granted His love and the fact that he's always there for me. As you know, it's easy to get caught up in the moment, friends, and especially busyness. In a world of nouns (people, places, things) trying to get my attention, I always come back to the realization that He's the only One that satisfies. Thankfully, God, being perfect, has never forgotten about me. Everyday He listens, reveals new things, and lets me enjoy the beauty of the world He has created. So even when I forget about the dates, chores, or even the past, I take comfort that I've got Someone holding me together!

Yes, I'm a Christian!

I love God. For who He is, for what He's done for me, and definitely for He's doing in me. I've never known a love like this. You may be in question about this. Hey, you may not even believe in God. But in His Word, the Bible, He tells us that if we seek Him, He will let Himself be found. Believe it or not, He loves you so much and wants you to know Him. When you're honestly looking for God, it will become something you can't push away!

Like I said, I've never known a love like this. I know what it's like to feel lost and hopeless and alone before surrendering to Him. And don't think I don't know that you've felt that way at times too. But after you give in to Him it's like life becomes so much...richer. satisfying. Maybe a corny illustration,but kind of like a Clarion Clear commercial. All of a sudden you can see life more clearly. Can I even go as far as to say that God is my technicolor in this gray and white world? Yes :) I guess I'm in love. 4 years of adventures and it never gets old.

I realize that everyone is looking for something to fill the emptiness in themselves. The longing for something more that you restle with in the night. Look at it this way. Imagine that you have a bucket. The bucket has the label "water" on it, but you pour coke, pickle juice and your favorite drink into it instead. Then, after filling it to the top, you're told that you're suppose to water a garden or give a baby a bath with the contents of the bucket. Would you do that? No! In the same way, you can't fulfill your purpose unless you you're filled with the right thing. The right thing that will give you the ability to achieve you destiny and fulfill your deepest needs is Jesus. He says, "I am the way, the truth, and the light. No one come to the Father except through me." let Him fill you with Himself and His love. You will never be the same.

I know that if you've read this far, you're probably thinking, "What about the bad things in life? How can that kind of life exist in the cruel world we live in?" Yes, bad things are in this world. In fact, they thrive. Just tonight I was watching a news report abou the starving people in Africa. (Don't read this if you're easily disturbed.) The child had flies or maggots on his face, too weak to keep them away due to the starvation and heat. Kids and adults are literally skin and bones over there. Maybe the hard things we experience in our everyday lives aren't as life threatening or major, but regardless, following Christ makes the difference. He gives us strenght to keep moving forward, comfort to the dying, and hope of life everlasting. I won't get into all the details of bad happenings in the world, but I will say that I Know I can trust God through it, and that He is completing His will, wether I can see it or not.
So, for these and other reasons, Yes, I'm a Christian!
<3
If you have any questions, fill free to ask! I will do my best to help you find the answers.

Color In My World...

"God, I love the way you color in my world. You make everything sing. So here is a picture of what my life will look like. See? I'd like you to fill it in and make it your masterpiece.
"Wait... You're...You're coloring it outside the lines...wait. It doesn't look right! That's not how my life's suppose to look at all! What are You doing, Lord?"

"My child, if you want it to be my masterpiece, you will have to trust me with it completely. Even when I draw outside your lines. Will you do that? Can you trust me with the design of your life?"

"Yes, Lord, I will. I do."

It was hard at first to watch Him do the unexpected with the picture of my life. At first I winced to watch the lines disappear under His colors and other parts of the picture cut out. But I after much watching, trusting, conversation, and waiting I saw things start to take form. It was... Beautiful. Free. Alive.
I soon saw the picture of what my life was to look like. It was the most precious masterpiece of all. It was a picture of my Salvation's face. The picture of my life was to be the image of Jesus. <3

By Heather Aycock
July 30th, 2011

Enough Said

 

Camp Memories:) Thank you, God!! :')

Girlll, we got dis;D

I was in American Eagle, just looking around. A pair of white jean shorts caught my eye. They were sooo cute! (Just play along. What's not to love??) So, although I knew I would Never in my life wear shorts that short or pay 30$ for them, I decided to try them on anyway. The salesclerk (Let's call her Maria) let me to one of the dressing rooms. Yes, I admit, I liked them alot, but then I started to remember my standards and why I have them. I finally put the shorts back where they belonged in my life: on the store shelf. Maria asked me, "You didn't like the pants??" I replied, "Umm...well, I did, but...I don't wear shorts that short." Then she said something I didn't expect: "Girll, don't be scared to show your legs. Looking down at her own bare ones, she continued, "It's okay!"

Well, I know that this is the normal message to girls in today's culture. The "message" I'm referring to isn't "wear our cute clothes." It's one that tells us to show our as much body off as we can get away with. Ever heard "If you've got it, flaunt it"? As American tween and teen girls we're given the indirect (and direct) impression that we are suppose to dress "hot."  If we aren't being told that this is the way to dress by companies, then we are being told this by the influence of other girl's dress. We as Christian girls may even be falling into the "fashion trap" ourselves. It's certainly not hard to do. But I know that there is a better way to go. I'm going to share it with you! It's called "modesty".

I would like to first say what modesty is Not.

Modesty is not:
being afraid of your feminity.
an excuse to judge others.
dressing yourself down.
boring.
impossible.:)

What modesty Is:
respecting yourself.
honoring God.
helping out your brothers in Christ.
letting people see beautiful you!

Why should we choose modesty? How is it specifically honoring God?

Modesty is showing that we respect ourselves. God says we "are fearfully and wonderfully made." God loves us! We as Christians are His daughters! There is no need to try to show off the outside when God is making our hearts beautiful. Our hearts, unique personalities, and spirits are the parts of us that will make the true and lasting impression on people. The Bible says "isn't the body more than clothes?" You are beautiful! Really! Believe it because it's true. God doesn't make mistakes...He planned every part of you.
God also says in 1Peter 3:3-5,
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put thier hope in God used to make them selves beautiful."
Does this mean we shouldn't care at all about how we look? No! But we must remember where our true beauty resides: in our hearts and spirits, as they are made more and more Christ-like.
What do guys think about it?

So I challenge you to choose a better way: modesty. Covering ourselves so that Christ will be the first thing they notice about us. Not just our outward beauty! <3

Growing Up

About to be 17.

And I look back on the steps I've taken

To become who I am.

Some steps were hard.

Some were painful.

But each have moved me closer to who I am today.

And who I am going to be.

.

I am serious,

Goofy,

(like duct tape on my shoes)

Passionate,

A good friend,

And a Christ-follower.

I try to see the beauty in little things.

I love having conversations that make me think.

I am trying to grow into who God wants me to be.

I love the adventure of life.

I love the vintage and hippie style.

I am almost 17.

I am me!